Ukuqinisekiswa kubaluleke kakhulu kwizinto zobomi bemihla ngemihla nasemsebenzini. Ehlabathini lomsebenzi, izinga eliphezulu lokuqinisekisa liza kukunika inzuzo eninzi kwaye ngakumbi ngakumbi xa ulawula iifayile ezibalulekileyo. Ukuqonda kangcono iziseko zokubambisana kunye negalelo layo kumnxibelelwano webhishini, simema ukuba ulandele inqaku lethu kude kube sekupheleni.
Yintoni eqinisekisayo?
Igama lokuqinisekisa livela kwi-English-born Assertiveness, ingcamango eqaliswe nguNew York wengqondo we-Andrew SALTER ku-1950. UJoseph Wolpe wavelisa le ngcamango ngokuchaza ukuba "ukubonakalisa ngokukhululekile zonke iimvakalelo ngokubhekiselele kumntu wesithathu, ngaphandle kwexhala".
Ukuqinisekiswa yindlela yokubonakalisa ukwazisa ngaphandle kokuguqula abanye, kwaye oku ngendlela echanekileyo. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuxhasana kukuchasene nemibono yesithathu yomntu wokubaleka, ukunyanzelisa nokunyanzelisa. Ezi zikhokelela ekunxibelelaneni kakubi kwaye kubangele ukuxabana, ukuxabana phakathi kwabadibaniselwano, ukungaqondani kunye nokuchitha ixesha.
Ukungafani nokuzithiba?
Ukuqinisekiswa okungafani nokuzithiba kuloo nxalenye yenkcazo kubandakanya ukuzimela. Ngoko ke kubalulekile ukuzibona kunye nokwamkela njengathi. Ngendlela echaseneyo, ukuzithiba kuthetha ukuchasana nokuziqonda kunye neemfuno, ingakumbi ukuba umntu unomdla, uyesaba, uyesaba okanye enye. Ngoko ke umbuzo wokukhetha indlela engafanelekanga ngayo kwimvakalelo, imilinganiselo, ubuntu ...
Ukuqinisekisa kunye nonxibelelwano olungathethiyo
Ukuqinisekisa kufuneka kuhambelane nonxibelelwano lwakho olungathethi ngomlomo. Xa uthetha nomntu, umyalezo wakho uyaviwa nge-10% enkosi kumagama kwaye yonke le nto ingumba wesimo sengqondo, izijekulo kunye nemvakalozwi lelizwi ikakhulu. Ke, kubalulekile ukuba ungenzi impazamo yokujolisa kuphela kumyalezo womlomo kuba le fomu ikwabalulekile kokubini kunxibelelwano nakunxibelelwano ngokubanzi.
Ukufundisa i-nonverbal kudinga ukuzivocavoca ezininzi, kuba kuxhomekeka kwizinto ezithile ezifana nentlawulo yenhliziyo, ukukhanya, ukuhluthwa kwabafundi ... Ngoko ke, ukuqinisekisa ukuvumelanisa phakathi kokuthetha kunye nokungabonakali, isisombululo esihle ihlabathi liya kuba linyanisekileyo kulo mbandela. Olu lumano lubizwa ngokuba yi-congruence.
Ukubambisana kukuqinisekisa ukuba kusetyenziswe ukuchithwa kwekhwalithi efanelekileyo. Unxibelelwano olungenanto ye-congruence ngoko kuthetha ukuphathwa. Le ndlela yokugqibela yokunxibelelana, nangona kunjalo, idinga amandla amaninzi ukuze kugcinwe umbonisi walo kumbono ochanekileyo. Ngako oko ukudideka phakathi kwegama elithi "ukunxibelelana", "amandla okukholisa" kunye "nokunyanzelisa".
Uqhagamshelwano okanye ulwalamano
Ukunxibelelana kukutshintshiselana phakathi kwabathengisi ababini, kodwa zonke izitshintshiswano azikho ukuxhumana. Ngaloo nto, kubalulekile ukuseka intsingiselo yeli gama, elisandul 'ukusetyenziswa kwiimeko ezingahambisani nenyaniso yalo.
Ewe, ukunxibelelana kakuhle kukwathetha ukuba nakho ukukwazi ukuvula isinxibelelanisi sakhe, ngenjongo yokuqonda ngcono iimfuno zakhe kwaye angazivezi izimvo zakhe njengabo kuphela abanelungelo lokucaphula. Ke ngoko kukho umahluko wokwenyani phakathi kokufana konxibelelwano kunye nentengiso okanye enye ipropaganda exhaphaza ngokungenampilo kwaye injongo kukunyanzela abaphulaphuli ukuba bamkele umbono.
Kule meko, ukuxhaphazwa kukubungqina bokusekwa kobudlelwane, phakathi kwabantu ababini, ngokusekelwe kwintlalo ngamnye enokubanika omnye. Ngokuqhelekileyo, olu lwalamano lunika inzuzo kumnye kwingozi yenye.
Ukuqinisekiswa ngokuchasene nokuphathwa
Xa umninimzi uthengisa umkhiqizo ngaphandle kokwazi ngokwenene iimfuno zabathengi bakhe, kodwa kuphela ngenjongo yokuthengisa impahla yakhe, sinokuthi kukho ukuphathwa. Kule meko, umthengi kufuneka azi ukuba kufuneka aqiniseke ngokuzichaza iimfuno zakhe kunye neengxaki aze akhethe kuphela iimveliso ezidibana nazo. Ukuze ugweme olu hlobo lwenkinga, nayiphi na inkampani kufuneka igxininise kwiimfuno zabaxhasi bayo phambi kokuqhubela phambili iinkonzo okanye iimveliso zayo. Ngaphandle koko, kunzima ukunyaniseka ukuba bafanele izinto ezizithengiswayo.
Ukuba ulingeka ukuba usebenzise ukunyanzeliswa ukuthengisa imveliso okanye ingcamango, wandise amandla akho ukuba abe neengxaki kwiimeko ezahlukeneyo okanye iziganeko. Kungokukwazi kwakho ukuvula umntu othetha naye kwaye uqaphele iimfuno zakho kungakhathaliseki ukuba umi. Kuthetha ukuthatha umbono kwi "4 ubukhulu", ezo zithuba kunye nexesha. Oko kukuqwalasela ixesha elidlulileyo, indawo awayebambe ngayo kwaye ephethe ...
Amanyathelo okulandelelana ngolwazi olufanelekileyo
lalela
Ingaba usebenza kwiinkonzo zononophelo okanye iinkonzo zokubamkela inkampani, musa ukwenza iphutha lokusika ilizwi lomthengi ukuliphendula ngokukhawuleza kwaye ulondoloze ixesha. Mnike ithuba lokuchaza ingxaki yakhe okanye kutheni ukhetha ukukhetha umkhiqizo omnye kwenye. Ngaloo ndlela, xa ufuna ukunikela omnye umkhiqizo okanye isisombululo, uya kuthanda ukufumana nokwamkela izimvo zakho. Nangona umntu othukutheleyo uya kubalahla ngokuchanekileyo.
siveze
Umntu osisigxina angakwazi ukubonakalisa ukuzimela kwakhe okanye ukuzibhokoxa. Abanye bakwenza ngokulula, abanye abakwenzi. Kule meko yesibini, ukukhungatheka kungaba yinto yokuba isasazeka kuwo wonke umzimba kwaye ivelise intukuthelo nomsindo. Eyona nto ingcono ukuchaza ngokucacileyo oko umntu acinga ngaphandle kokuguquka kwesi sifundo kwaye ngaphandle kokuhlaselwa.
Yamkela uphendule kwimbuyekezo
Akukho mbono uphelele, bonke banesiphako. Uninzi lwangexesha, ngabaxhamli bethu baqaphela le mpazamo. Ukwamkela ingcamango yabanye kuthetha umnqweno wokuphucula okanye ukuvuleka kweengcamango ezintsha. Impazamo iya kuba kukukhanyela ukungapheleli komntu wonke kunye nokuzikhawulela kwimibono yangaphambili.
Isitayela soqhagamshelwano okhoyo ngoku sisiphumo seminyaka emininzi yomkhwa. Kwakhona, lindele ukuba usebenze ixesha elithile ngaphambi kokuba ufunde imigaqo yokuqinisekisa. Umngeni omkhulu kunokuba ufunde ukuphulaphula ngokufanelekileyo ukufumanisa iimfuno zakho, uya kufunda ngokukhawuleza ukuba uphendule ngaphandle kokwenza ngokugqithisileyo. Ngaloo ndlela, ukuqinisekiswa kukulinganisela okulungileyo phakathi kokuziphatha okungahambiyo kunye nokuziphatha okubi.
