Ukungagunci kuyinto kwempahla ebalulekile kokubili ekuphileni kwansuku zonke emsebenzini. Ezweni yomsebenzi, nenani elikhulu ukungagunci kuyokulethela inzuzo eside ikakhulukazi uma ugade amafayela ezibalulekile. Ukuze uqonde kangcono izisekelo zokuqinisekisa kanye nomthelela walo ekukhulumisaneni ezinkampani, sikucela ukuba ulandele indaba yethu kuze kube sekupheleni.

Kuyini ukuqinisekiswa?

Igama lokuqinisekisa livela ku-English-born Assertiveness, umqondo osungulwe isazi sengqondo seNew York u-Andrew SALTER ku-1950. UJoseph Wolpe wahlakulela lo mqondo ngokuwuchaza ngokuthi "ukubonakalisa mahhala yonke imizwelo ngokuya kumuntu wesithathu, ngaphandle kokukhathazeka".

Ukuqinisekiswa kuyindlela yokuveza ukwazisa ngaphandle kokushintsha abanye, futhi lokhu ngendlela eqondile. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuphikisa kuphikisa isimo sengqondo sesithathu somuntu wendiza, ukuxhaphazwa nokuhlukunyezwa. Lokhu kuholela ekukhulumisaneni okubi futhi kubangele ukungezwani, ukungqubuzana phakathi kwama-interlocutors, ukungaqondani kanye nokuchitha isikhathi.

Ukungafani nokuzithiba?

Ukuqiniswa okungafani nokuzithiba kuleso sigaba sencazelo yaso kuhilela ukuzimela. Ngakho-ke kubalulekile ukuzibona nokwamukela ngokwakho njengathi. Ngomqondo ohlukile, ukuzithiba kusho ukungahambisani nokuziqaphela kanye nezidingo zakho, ikakhulukazi uma umuntu engacindezeli, esaba, esaba noma ehlukile. Ngakho-ke kungumbuzo wokukhetha ukuphendula okungokwemvelo kumzwelo womuntu, izindinganiso, ubuntu ...

Ukuzethemba nokuxhumana okungenamlomo

Ukuqiniseka kufanele futhi kufane nokuxhumana kwakho okungenamlomo. Uma ukhuluma nomuntu, umyalezo wakho uzwakala ngo-10% ngenxa yamagama futhi okunye kuyindaba yesimo sengqondo, ukushukuma komzimba nokuphakama kwezwi ikakhulu. Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukuthi ungenzi iphutha lokugxila kumlayezo womlomo kuphela ngoba ifomu nalo libalulekile kokubili ekwethulweni nasekuxhumaneni ngokujwayelekile.

Ukuba yingcweti umsebenzi ubonisa kanjani ukuthi uyangeneka kodwa zidinga kakhulu, ngoba kuncike ezintweni ezifana nokushaya kwenhliziyo, isikhumba tone, umfundi Ukuvuleka komlomo ... Ngakho, ukuqinisekisa ukuvumelana phakathi ngamazwi kanye ubonisa kanjani ukuthi uyangeneka, ikhambi ekahle zonke umhlaba ubuyoba ngobuqotho ngale ndaba. Lokhu sikubiza congruence ngokuvumelana.

I-Congruence iqinisekisa ukusungulwa kwekhwalithi enhle yekhwalithi. Ngakho-ke ukukhulumisana okungafani ne-congruence kusho ukuphathwa. Le ndlela yokugcina yokuxhumana, noma kunjalo, idinga amandla amaningi ukugcina i-interlocutor yayo embonweni oqondile. Ngakho-ke ukudideka phakathi kwemigomo "ukuxhumana", "amandla okukholisa" kanye "nokuxhaphaza".

Ukuxhumana noma ubuhlobo

Ukuxhumana yi-exchange phakathi kwama-interlocutors amabili, kodwa konke ukushintshaniswa akuyona ukuxhumana. Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukubeka incazelo ecacile yale nkulumo, esanda kusetshenziselwa izimo ezingavumelani ngempela nencazelo yalo yangempela.

Ngempela, ukuba ngumxhumanisi omuhle futhi kusho ukuba nekhono lokuvulela lowo akhuluma naye, ukuze abone kangcono izidingo zakhe futhi angavezi imibono yakhe njengayo kuphela enelungelo lokucaphuna. Ngakho-ke kukhona umehluko wangempela phakathi kokufana kokuxhumana nezentengiso noma enye inkulumo-ze evame ukukhohlisa okungenampilo futhi inhloso yayo ukuphoqa izethameli ukwamukela umbono.

Kulesi simo, ukuxhaphazwa kuwubufakazi bokusungulwa kobudlelwane, phakathi kwabantu ababili, ngokusekelwe ekutheni umuntu ngamunye anganikeza omunye. Ngokuvamile, lobu buhlobo buhlinzeka izinzuzo komunye ekulimazeni komunye.

Ukuqinisekiswa ngokumelene nokuxhaphazwa

Uma umthengisi uthengisa umkhiqizo ngaphandle kokwazi ngempela izidingo zangempela zamakhasimende akhe, kodwa ngenhloso yokuthengisa izimpahla zakhe, singasho ukuthi kukhona ukuxhaphazwa. Kulesi simo, ikhasimende kumele likwazi ukuthi liba njani ngokufakazela izidingo nezinkinga zakhe bese ukhetha kuphela imikhiqizo ehlangabezana nabo. Ukuze ugweme lolu hlobo lwenkinga, noma iyiphi inkampani kufanele igxile kuzidingo zamakhasimende ayo ngaphambi kokudlulisela phambili amasevisi noma imikhiqizo yayo. Uma kungenjalo, kunzima ukuqiniseka ukuthi bafanele ukuthenga izinto ezithengiswayo.

Uma ulingeka ukuba usebenzise ukuxhaphaza ukuthengisa umkhiqizo noma umqondo, ukwandisa ikhono lakho lokuzwela ezimweni ezahlukene noma imicimbi. Kungenxa yekhono lakho lokuvulela umuntu okhuluma naye futhi uqaphele izidingo zakho kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ume kuphi. Kusho ukuthatha umbono "ngobukhulu be-4", yesikhala nesikhathi. Lokhu kuzokucabangela isikhathi sakhe esidlule, indawo ayebambe ngayo nokuthi uphethe ...

Izinyathelo zokulandela ukuxhumana okuhle

          ukulalela

Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi usebenza eminyangweni yokunakekelwa noma iminyango ye-hospitality yenkampani, ungenzi iphutha lokusika igama leklayenti ukuze uliphendule ngokushesha bese ulondoloza isikhathi. Mnike ithuba lokuchaza inkinga yakhe noma kungani ekhetha ukukhetha umkhiqizo owodwa phezu komunye. Ngakho-ke, uma ufuna ukunikeza omunye umkhiqizo noma isisombululo, uzothambekela ngokwengeziwe ukuthola nokwamukela imibono yakho. Ngenkathi umuntu othukuthele uzowachitha ngokuhlelekile.

          siveze imizwa

Umuntu oqinisayo angakwazi ukuveza ukukhathazeka kwakhe noma ukuzibheka ngokwakhe. Abanye bakwenza kalula, abanye abakwenzi. Kuleli cala lesibili, ukukhungatheka kungase kube yilapho kusakazeka kuwo wonke umzimba futhi kudala ukufutheka nentukuthelo. Ngakho-ke, okungcono kakhulu ukuveza ngokuqondile lokho umuntu ocabanga ngaphandle kokugwema indaba futhi ngaphandle kokuhlasela i-interlocutor yakhe.

          Yamukela futhi uphendule ukubuyisa

Akukho mqondo ophelele, bonke banephutha. Esikhathini esiningi, yizixhumanisi zethu eziqaphela leli phutha. Ukwamukela umbono wabanye kusho isifiso sokuthuthukisa noma ukuvula imibono emisha. Iphutha kungaba ukuphika ukungapheleli komuntu wonke nokuzikhawulela emibonweni yomuntu yangempela.

Isitayela sokuxhumana okwamanje unomphumela weminyaka eminingi yomkhuba. Futhi, kulindeleke ukuba usebenzise isikhathi esithile ngaphambi kokuba ufunde izimiso zokuqinisekisa. Inselele enkulu ukufunda ukulalela ngokuphumelelayo ukukhomba izidingo zakho, uzothola kancane kancane ukuphendula ngaphandle kokwenza ngokuhlukumeza. Ngakho-ke, ukuqinisela ukulinganisela okulungile phakathi kokuziphatha okungahambi kahle nokuziphatha okubi.