Zitholele Ubuciko Bokuthonya no-Dale Carnegie

Ubani ongakaze afise ukuba nabangane abengeziwe, ukwaziswa okwengeziwe noma ukuba nethonya elikhulu kubantu abamzungezile? Encwadini yakhe ethengiswa kakhulu ethi, “Indlela Yokwenza Abangane Nokuthonya Abanye,” uDale Carnegie unikeza umhlahlandlela obalulekile kunoma ubani ofuna ukuthuthukisa lamakhono abalulekile omphakathi. Kusukela yanyatheliswa ngo-1936, le ncwadi iye yasiza izigidi zabantu emhlabeni wonke ukuba zakhe ubuhlobo obungcono, bathole ukuhlonishwa nokutuswa, futhi babe nethonya elihle kulabo ababazungezile.

UCarnegie, umbhali nomfundisi odumile waseMelika mayelana nentuthuko yomuntu siqu kanye nokuxhumana phakathi kwabantu, unikeza uchungechunge lwezimiso nezindlela zokuzuza ubungane babanye, ukubathonya ngendlela enhle nokuphatha ubudlelwano babantu ngempumelelo. Incwadi yakhe, elula kodwa ejulile, isalokhu iyisidingo kubo bonke labo abafisa ukwenza kahle ekusebenzelaneni kwabo kwezenhlalo nakwezobuchwepheshe.

Esikhundleni sokuthembisa imiphumela esheshayo nelula, uCarnegie ugcizelela ukubaluleka kobuqotho, inhlonipho, nokukhathalela okuqotho ngabanye. Kusikhumbuza ukuthi ithonya langempela livela ekhonweni lokuqonda nokwazisa abantu abasizungezile. Le ncwadi ayiyona nje inkomba yokwenza abangani, kodwa iyimanuwali yokuba umuntu ongcono.

Izihluthulelo zokuzuza ubungane nokutuswa kwabanye

U-Dale Carnegie uchithe ingxenye enkulu yempilo yakhe eqonda izimfihlo zokusebenzisana okuphumelelayo komphakathi. Kwesithi “Indlela Yokwenza Abangane Nokuthonya Abanye,” wabelana ngezimiso ezibalulekile zokwenza ukuxhumana okuhle nabantu esiphila nabo. Eyokuqala futhi mhlawumbe ebaluleke kakhulu yalezi zimiso ukubaluleka kokukhathalela abanye ngobuqotho.

UCarnegie waphikelela ngokuthi asinakuvusa isithakazelo sabanye uma thina ngokwethu singenasithakazelo kubo. Lokhu akusho nje ukubuza imibuzo ukuze ubonakale unentshisekelo. Kunalokho, imayelana nokuba nesithakazelo esiqotho kubantu nasekuphileni kwabo. Ngokubonisa uzwela nelukuluku, sikhuthaza abanye ukuba bakhululeke futhi bahlanganyele okwengeziwe ngabo.

Ngaphezu kokukhathalela abanye, uCarnegie ugcizelela ukubaluleka kokwazisa abanye nokubabenza bazizwe bebalulekile. Kungaba lula njengokuqaphela impumelelo yabanye noma ukubancoma ngokuthile abakwenze kahle. Ngokwenza lokhu, asibasizi nje kuphela ukuthi bazizwe belungile ngabo, kodwa futhi sakha ukuxhumana okuhle nabo.

Esinye isimiso esibalulekile ukugwema ukugxekwa, ukugxeka noma ukukhononda. Lezi zenzo kuphela zidudula abantu futhi zidale ukungqubuzana. Kunalokho, uCarnegie uphakamisa ukuqonda nokuthethelela amaphutha abanye, futhi abakhuthaze ukuba bashintshe ukuziphatha kwabo ngezindlela ezinhle.

Ungabathonya kanjani abanye ngendlela enhle futhi uthuthukise ukuxhumana kwakho

U-Dale Carnegie uphinde wabelane ngemibono eminingi yokuthi angaba nomthelela kanjani kwabanye. Esinye seziphakamiso zakhe ezinamandla kakhulu ukukhombisa ukwazisa kwabanye ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ugcizelela ukuthi umuntu ngamunye udinga ukuzizwa aziswa futhi aziswa.

I-Carnegie iphinde inikeze ukuthuthukisa amakhono ethu okuxhumana ngokukhuluma ngendlela ethakazelisayo nehehayo. Usikisela ukuthi ngaso sonke isikhathi kufanele sizame ukubheka izinto ngendlela omunye umuntu azibheka ngayo. Lokhu kuzosisiza ukuba siqonde kangcono izidingo zabo nalokho abakudingayo, futhi kusivumele ukuthi sikhulume nabo ngempumelelo kakhudlwana.

Le ncwadi futhi igcizelela ukubaluleka kokumomotheka nokubonisa isimo sengqondo esihle. UCarnegie ugcizelela ukuthi ukumomotheka kungenye yezinkulumo ezinamandla kakhulu esingazinikeza abanye. Ukumomotheka okuqotho kungadiliza izithiyo, kudale ukuxhumana okusheshayo, futhi kwenze abanye bamukele imibono neziphakamiso zethu.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, uCarnegie uchaza ukuthi ukuze sithonye abanye, kumelwe sibakhuthaze futhi sibazise. Esikhundleni sokugxeka amaphutha, uncoma ukukhomba okuhle nokunikeza iziphakamiso ezakhayo zokuthuthukisa.

Ekugcineni, uCarnegie weluleka ukuvuselela isifiso kwabanye kunokuba abaphoqelele ukuba benze ngendlela ethile. Usikisela ukuthi kufanele senze omunye afune lokho esikunikezayo, simbonise izinzuzo nemivuzo angayithola.

Ngokusebenzisa lawa macebiso ekuphileni kwethu kwansuku zonke, asikwazi nje ukuba nethonya elihle kwabanye, kodwa futhi sithuthukise kakhulu amakhono ethu okuxhumana.

 

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