Choonadi Pamtima pa Kuyanjana kwa Anthu
M'buku lake "Lekani kukhala wabwino, khalani weniweni! Kukhala ndi ena mukukhala nokha ”, a Thomas D'Ansembourg amawunikira mozama njira yathu yolankhulirana. Iye akupereka lingaliro lakuti mwa kuyesera kukhala abwino kwambiri, tingatengeke ndi kutengeka kuchoka ku chowonadi chathu chamkati.
Kukoma mtima mopambanitsa, malinga ndi kunena kwa D'Ansembourg, kaŵirikaŵiri kumakhala mtundu wobisa. Timayesetsa kukhala ovomerezeka, nthawi zina mosasamala za zosowa zathu ndi zokhumba zathu. Apa ndi pamene pali ngozi. Mwa kunyalanyaza zosowa zathu, timadziika tokha ku kukhumudwa, mkwiyo, ngakhale kupsinjika maganizo.
D'Ansembourg imatilimbikitsa kuti tizitengera kulankhulana koona. Ndi njira yolankhulirana yomwe timafotokozera zakukhosi kwathu ndi zosowa zathu popanda kuukira kapena kuimba mlandu ena. Iye akugogomezera kufunikira kwa kutsimikiza, komwe ndiko kuthekera kufotokoza momveka bwino zosowa zathu ndikuyika malire.
Lingaliro lofunikira m'bukuli ndi la Kulankhulana Kwachiwawa (NVC), njira yolankhulirana yopangidwa ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo Marshall Rosenberg. NVC imatilimbikitsa kufotokoza zakukhosi kwathu ndi zosowa zathu mwachindunji, kwinaku tikumvetsera mwachifundo kwa ena.
NVC, malinga ndi D'Ansembourg, ndi chida champhamvu cholimbikitsira maubwenzi athu ndikupanga kulumikizana kowona ndi ena. Pokhala enieni muzochita zathu, timadzitsegulira tokha ku ubale wabwino ndi wokhutiritsa.
Kukoma Mtima Wobisika: Kuopsa Kwa Kusakhulupirika
Mu "Lekani kukhala wabwino, khalani weniweni! Kukhala ndi ena pomwe umakhala wekha ”, D'Ansembourg amafotokoza za vuto la kukoma mtima kobisika, mawonekedwe omwe ambiri aife timatengera pazochita zathu zatsiku ndi tsiku. Akunena kuti kukoma mtima kwabodza kumeneku kungayambitse kusakhutira, kukhumudwa ndipo pamapeto pake mikangano yosafunikira.
Kukoma mtima kobisika kumachitika pamene tibisa malingaliro athu enieni ndi zosowa zathu kuti tipewe mikangano kapena kuti avomerezedwe ndi ena. Koma potero, timadzichotsera tokha kuthekera kokhala ndi ubale weniweni komanso wozama. M’malo mwake, timakhala ndi maunansi ongoyerekezera ndi osakhutiritsa.
Kwa D'Ansembourg, chofunika kwambiri ndicho kuphunzira kufotokoza maganizo athu enieni ndi zosowa zathu mwaulemu. Iyi si ntchito yophweka, chifukwa imafunika kulimba mtima komanso kusatetezeka. Koma ndi ulendo wofunika. Pamene tikhala owona, timadzitsegulira tokha ku ubale wabwino ndi wozama.
Potsirizira pake, kukhala wowona sikuli kwabwino kokha kwa maubwenzi athu, komanso kwa moyo wathu waumwini. Mwa kuvomereza ndi kulemekeza malingaliro athu ndi zosowa zathu, timadzisamalira tokha. Ndi sitepe yofunika kwambiri kuti munthu akhale ndi moyo wokhutiritsa komanso wokhutiritsa.
Kulankhulana Kopanda Chiwawa: Chida Chodziwonetsera Yekha
Kuwonjezera pa kufufuza nkhani zokhudzana ndi kukoma mtima kobisika, "Lekani kukhala wabwino, khalani weniweni! Kukhala ndi ena mukukhala nokha” kumapereka Kulankhulana Kwankhanza (NVC) ngati chida champhamvu chofotokozera mowona mtima komanso mwaulemu zakukhosi ndi zosowa zathu.
NVC, yopangidwa ndi Marshall Rosenberg, ndi njira yomwe imatsindika chifundo ndi chifundo. Kumaphatikizapo kulankhula moona mtima popanda kuimba mlandu kapena kudzudzula ena, ndi kumvetsera ena mwachifundo. Pamtima pa NVC ndi chikhumbo chopanga mgwirizano weniweni waumunthu.
Malinga ndi a D'Ansembourg, kugwiritsa ntchito NVC pazochita zathu zatsiku ndi tsiku kungatithandize kuti tisiye chifundo chobisika. M’malo moumirira maganizo athu enieni ndi zosoŵa zathu, timaphunzira kuzifotokoza mwaulemu. Izi sizimangopangitsa kuti tikhale owona, komanso kuti tikhale ndi ubale wabwino ndi wokhutiritsa.
Mwa kukumbatira NVC, titha kusintha machitidwe athu a tsiku ndi tsiku. Timachoka paubwenzi wachiphamaso komanso wosakhutiritsa n’kupita paubwenzi weniweni ndi wokhutiritsa. Ndi kusintha kwakukulu komwe kungathe kusintha kwambiri moyo wathu.
"Lekani kukhala wabwino, lankhulani chilungamo! Kukhala ndi ena pamene ukudzisungira wekha” ndikuitana kuti ukhale woona. Ndi chikumbutso chakuti tili ndi ufulu wokhala tokha ndi kuti tiyenera kukhala ndi maubwenzi abwino ndi okhutiritsa. Mwa kuphunzira kukhala enieni, timatsegula mwayi wokhala ndi moyo wolemera ndi wokhutiritsa.
Ndipo kumbukirani, mutha kuzolowera ziphunzitso zazikuluzikulu za bukhuli kudzera mu kanema pansipa, koma izi sizingalowe m'malo mowerenga buku lonse kuti mumvetsetse bwino komanso mozama mfundo zosinthazi.
